Thursday, June 3, 2010

WENS the DAY over!??

Well, I thought today would be a marvelous day, Lillian and I didnt get out of bed until 11, well I got out of bed at 11, she slept... When she woke at noon, she cried, and cried, and cried until one. And fell asleep. Then around 2, she cried and cried and cried, and fell asleep for a good while..
Rachel was going to come spend the night with us so she SHOULDA been in a good mood! Rachel and I and Lillian went to visit Tara and her mom to drop off mary kay products... BRYNLEIGH is soo cute and chunky, I keep tellin Lilli to chunken up so they can play! Its hard right now, b/c I want to sit them together and let them play together as babies, but because Lillian has so many tubes, we cant really do that...
Then the 3 of us went to dinner and Lillian cried throughout dinner... we got home and I was going to prepare another bottle for her- even tho, SHE ATE AT DINNER! And my mom is just making rude rediculous comments. No parent wants to hear: she's holding Lillian telling me "she's hungry" "shes hungry" " your mom is starving you, I know your hungry" ( all in this time I am unthawing a bottle that didnt unthaw itself in the frig. Then she wants to put her finger in Lillians mouth... ok, thats fine, but your hands arent clean, and she is crying all day, she could be getting sick, dirty fingers... no thanks... Then she is messing with a binky in her mouth and says " I know, you poor baby, your mom wasnt prepared".... UM... I did everything I ALWAYS do. I fed her while we were out, we got home, she was hungry again, I had to UNTHAW the milk!!!! SHHEEEZ. I swear she has no feelings sometimes. Like everything that is happening to me is just shit I have to deal with. WELL, I am dealing with it, but I am heartbroken at the same time. Two heartbreaks in two months is NOT an easy situation! Anyways, Im glad one heartbreak turned into such an amazing blessing that I get to kiss and hug and hold as much as I want. She's my angel.
The other, we'll just see how much harder he can make my life for me... BLA.
So now Rachel and I and Lilli are just layin in bed :0)
I love this. Im so grateful for this moment right now... even tho the two of them just started snoring.. I wish I had more rachels for every night of the week... :0) a man one would be nice!
Everyone have an awsome night! Our dietician comes in the morning-- hope we can chunken Lil up... OH MY GAH- THE WHOLE REASON I WANTED TO WRITE THIS TODAY: ::: Lilli drank 1oz out of her bottle!! big girl bottle!! 1 hole oz!!! Im so proud. So So proud... Baby steps...
:0) have a great night
Lauren and Lillian


Anonymous said...

I am so proud that she drank it! Was good to see you guys eventhough I know it has to be nerve wracking to take her out. You are the best mommy I know! Love you guys!

Kami said...

Congrats to Lilli on one ounce from the bottle! That is a lot!! 30 cc's - remember syringe feedings? Congrats to Mommy on such a big achievement!

Can you politely ask your mom to refrain from making negative comments? Or would that make it worse? Hopefully she will be more sensitive. I guess you could just say, "Yep, trying to starve her, hence the bottle I am defrosting."

Good weekend wishes to you and lots of chugging a lugging to Lilli!!